When the Mundane Becomes Special

Feeding our dogs can become such a chore sometimes, can't it? So much so, that we assign it to the kids, supposedly to "teach them responsibility". Sometimes, I think, though, that it's just because we're so busy with everything else in our lives that we just don't want that one extra thing in our day.

Brian and I rarely put stock in celebrities, simply because more often than not, they are all glam and hype, and less actual substance. So it's somewhat surprising that when we have a question about dog training and raising, we turn to Cesar Millan, The Dog Whisperer, or one of Cesar's many books or his website. Fact is, though, his methods work, when applied properly. When it was time to bring Freedom home, I went to the library, and picked up a copy of his book Raising the Perfect Dog, and read it cover to cover. Soon, it will become a permanent part of my library, as it covers the first 2 years of a dog's life, and I'll be referring to it over and over.

I mention Mr. Millan, because something I've seen on his show more than once that strikes more deeply each time I've seen it mentioned is the concept of exercise/discipline/affection. It's the third part of that concept that touched me deeply today with the dogs when I woke up feeling terrible, my depression taking not just an emotional, but a physical toll on me.

Mr. Millan talks about the feeding ritual as a way of showing your dogs affection. He prepares his packs' meals by hand, mixing the dry kibble with some canned food (something we do here at home as well) while the dogs wait quietly for their meal (yes, this is possible, even with 8 week old pups-they will learn to wait very quickly when the behavior is modeled and expected!). He talks about projecting the love he feels for his dogs while preparing these meals. When was the last time you prepared any meal, for animal or human family member, with thoughts of love for the individual(s) that you're preparing it for? Or do you habitually rush through the process, tossing the food into the bowl, or onto to the plate, and setting it in front of the recipient without further thought?

Brian and I have made it a ritual to lovingly prepare the dogs' meals by hand while they wait, offering the hand that mixed the bowl to both dogs to lick clean. It's a shared moment that is incomparable and indescribable. This is their payday for their 24/7 work, and their thanks for the love we give them. There is no rush in the licking, and they gently step away when they're ready for the real meal. And we can accomplish this step with all four dogs when we're with Mom's pack as well. I wish I had enough hands to get a point-of-view snapshot of all four dogs happily cleaning my fingers after mixing a meal. Even shy and reserved Bella will come up and have a few tastes before sliding away to her bed.

This morning, however, I woke up feeling terrible, both mentally and physically. For those who are fortunate enough to have never dealt with severe depression, it's not something that's all in one's head, and it's not just a "down" feeling that goes away with a few jokes, unfortunately. It's a chemical imbalance in the brain, and it causes a number of symptoms which include emotional, cognitive and physical issues. For me, I woke up with a terrible headache, and my legs were stiff and sore. Both dogs took their needed potty breaks, then gracefully crawled back into bed with us, and snuggled with me until I finally was able to pull myself out of bed to get their breakfast while Brian did outdoor potty trip duty, as my body wasn't up to the trip down the stairs just yet. Hanging out in bed more or less quietly for almost 3 hours is a lot to ask of any puppy 14 or 9 weeks, but to have them do it voluntarily, is an amazing gift that wasn't lost on me. Needless to say, there was a lot of love and appreciation in their kibble this morning!

Freedom wasn't done, though. After his breakfast was eaten, he whined until I came and got him, and he napped on my lap for another 4 or 5 hours until lunch time. He's been my velcro dog all day long, at least until I was stable enough to get around a little better. On our walks, he's been forgiving of my slowness when my legs get tired faster than usual, and puts up with me, and he's reserved his bad-boy act for his kitchen romps with Tardis (who's been a little less forgiving, but is still looking at me as though trying to figure out what's wrong with me today).

All this got me thinking, though, about how we show our affection to those around us. We're told that we shouldn't use food to show affection to our kids, and to an extent, I think that's true. We don't need to buy our kids' love with sweets and junk food, or toys and games. But we can show our kids, our pets, and our families that we love them by taking the time to really shower them with love by thoughtfully preparing nutritious meals, and taking time away from our electronic, hurried lives to spend a bit of time playing and exercising with them.

After all, if you exercise the body and mind, have the discipline to maintain your rules, boundaries, limitations and rituals, you'll have more affection flowing both directions in the relationship than you know what to do with!

Go enjoy a little time with your two and four legged loved ones, and be blessed! Thanks for reading.

Things I've Learned From the Dogs....

We may train dogs to do what we would like them to do, but more often than not, they can teach us valuable lessons in life and love. Here's just a few of the lessons the dogs in my life have taught me:

Even when you're grumpy, a bunch of babies around you, can make your day.

A good run in the park makes everything better...

Only eat when you're hungry, and when you're full, walk away from your dish.

Cuddles cure loneliness.

Sometimes, you just have to chew on a problem for a bit, until it's solved.

Or, just sleep on it a bit...

Go for a walk, or just lay in the grass when inside is just too boring.

Nothing beats a good belly rub.

Wag your tail, bark less, growl only when you truly mean it, and lick liberally. Love unconditionally.

What happened in the past means nothing in the present. Live in the NOW.

If it doesn't love you and you can't eat it or play with it... piss on it and walk away.

Check everyone out. If they don't feel right, move away quickly without a fuss.

Dogs don't gossip. They take everyone at face value in the here and now. If someone isn't in the right frame of mind right now, they give that someone the opportunity to get there, and then they walk away. Think about how much less drama we'd have in our lives if we lived like that.

The pack sticks together, always. There is no stronger bond than that of a balanced, bonded pack.

Move when you have energy, or you'll get frustrated. Sleep when you're tired, or you'll get grumpy. Play often, have a purpose, love much, know who's in charge.

Start and end every day with a kiss and a ritual.